kope from levin

kope from levin's post-it note on the wall yesterday. haha.


'relationship is about communication'

update

thought i shall GRACE my blog with some updates. haha.

for some reasons, i m very much less stressed than last semester over the finals that is coming really soon. comparatively, i was less stressed last semester than my time in spore. in conclusion, xiuling is a slacker now! wahahaha.

anyway, updates updates!

talked to michele that day, and it was really nice
unexpected things happened but xiuling will learn from it
flying home on 14th november 2009 (woohoo!)
flying to melb in the middle of my exam period just for my dear cousin who will be celebrating her 1st birthday! haha :D flying on 7th nov and coming back to sydney on 9th nov.
cant be bothered about my weight anymore
so, please dont freak out when you see me when i m back. haha

back to work!! :D :D

thanks for reading!!!!! :D :D :D

me.

a considerably close friend in the same course is transferring to medicine next year.
another friend is thinking of transferring to med science.

all of a sudden, i was thrown into a sea of questions, M I DOING WHAT I SHOULD BE DOING? Is the degrees and hence possible careers that i m putting myself in suitable for me?

i realized that i have always wanted to be a lawyer. maybe that was since i was 4 or 5 years old. and that is what spurred me to study hard since i was really young.

my motivation to strive for excellence is actually my aunt and her family. i was brought up by my aunt and her family until i was 4 or 5 years old. i have no idea why i was put with my aunt since i was an infant. but yes, i remember living there with my aunt, uncle and my 5 other cousins. they are all a tad elder than me and i was like the little kid. they were definitely not rich, but my aunt worked really hard. i know that i was not in the middle or upper class family. and one day, when we were watching some hk drama, it struck me --> what happens to those people who are poor but who are taken to court and they cant afford to hire lawyers to advise or represent them? why is it so unfair? and then, i set my mind on becoming a lawyer, a lawyer who will help those who are poor (which i found out much later that it is called pro bono ^-^)
i did not like the feeling of being looked down upon and i told myself that when i grow up, i will earn enough to give my aunt a comfortable life.

i went back to stay with my parents when i was 4 or 5 years old. and then life just goes on, primary school, secondary school in muar and then singapore, and then jc in singapore. so many things happened and somehow, this passion to be a lawyer was lost somewhere. i was just striving to excel because i was paid to study and it was expected of me to perform. and i wanted to perform to make my parents proud. my confidence level was thrashed a couple of times, esp when i was in JC and i started to doubt myself, unsure if the apparently tough and grueling law degree was something that i could handle. thanks to my parents who insisted on this, because i have no regrets that i m doing a commerce/law double degree now.

i might not the top student in law. it might not be sth that i ace in now. but i have found that desire and purpose again. eventually, my degrees are foundations and stepping stone for me to help people who i want to help. and of course, like what judge kirby said in a lecture a couple of months ago, the most important and valuable thing in everyone's life is to have a partner who can share his/her joy, suffering, pain and all experiences in life.







i m not someone who likes people to press me further for information. so if i can keep this to myself for so many years, i hope that, if you read this, just take it as 'oooooh, it's like that' and do not ask me anything else. thank you. :D

inspirations

thanks to susan who re-introduced me to the video of nick vujicic

and this thought suddenly hit me again. if he can do what he is doing, why can't i? what is stopping me from doing what i want to if i put my heart to it?

almost immediately, i thought of Team Hoyt

These people are just amazing. They challenged themselves to a limit where many of us wouldn't even tried. What give them the courage? because they are faced with more limitations, because of their love for life.

Love your life and the people around you. Challenge yourself, because you never know how far you can go. stop thinking about superficial things and think about what you want to achieve in this life, in this short life that you never know when and how it is going to end.

my favourite extract from nick vujicic's presentation at a school:

sometimes in life when u fall down, u feel like u don't have the strength to get back up.
do you think you have hope?
i will try 100 times to get up
if i fail 100 times, if i fail n i give up, do you think i m ever going to get up
but if i fail, i try again n agian , n again
it's not the end
it matter how u going to finish
u going to finish strong
then u will find that strength to get back up

quick update

i m flying home on 14th november 2009! :D
and suprisingly enough, janet and i will be on the same flight. haha. we will most probably see each other on the flight then. LOL
and daryl, lisa and oi fong are also flying on the same day, but they are flying to Singapore an hour after my flight departs. LOL

although i have gained weight, i m still looking forward to food at home! what a glutton, right? but ya, i need some exercise regime to help me lose some weight. for some reason, IH is making me fatter!! rarh.

Oktoberfest at roundhouse yesterday was crazy. how people walked on IH roof top, and thought that IH is also an entrance to the roundhouse. pity the seniors and other residents who have so kindly protected our sacred residential college. haha. Hooray!! :D IH has its own bouncers! so think twice before you intrude our ground. wahahahaha :D

time to start studying. for some reasons, i have been feeling lethargic. rarh.

back to work :D

a post specially for ping ping

talking to ping ping has always been so fun.
darling, if you read this, I MISS HAVING YOU IN MY ROOM!!!

and this reminds me of how small our room was! LOL :D

enjoy your time in chicago and take care ya!! :D :D

.help her.

i read this and i think that all of us should contribute.

http://helpyenkee.co.cc/

for the newspaper article: http://www.guangming.com.my/node/57665?tid=10


if you are unsure whether this is a scam, give guang ming daily a call to verify.

chij sec (toa payoh)

so, ken gave me this idea of goo-gling my own name when i m bored.

and among other stuff, i found this! :D

Nothing Funny in this Picture

Friday September 22, 2006 Caricature undermines convents' rich legacy, strong moral values No condoning humour at the expense of innocents Letter from Valerie Goh Meishi, Germaine Liu Shumei, Quek Xiu Ling, Lee Sze Ching, Chua Qi Yi, Sabrina Chu Ming Ling, Cheng Hui Ting, Marie Tan Xue-Ling, Joyce Tan Yi Siang, Eirene Koh Jia Xuan, Jana Ho Jiale, Zhuo Yun Lu, and Secondary 4/1 of 2006 We are a group of students from the graduating class of the Convent of the Holy Infant Jesus Secondary (CHIJ). In the article, "Alternative Singapore: The Encyclopedia"(The Sunday Times, Sept 17), the student population of the 11 CHIJ schools around Singapore was referred to under the letter "I" for "IJ girls". We are greatly dismayed and distressed by the insinuations made against our beloved school and feel a strong need to defend its good name. In particular, the statement "easy with the opposite sex" and the inappropriate caricature contradict the strong moral values that come with an IJ education. The article has done great injustice to CHIJ schools that have produced many admirable women, past and present, who have made great contributions to our society - among whom was the late Elizabeth Choy. The Sunday Times is read not only by locals, but by international visitors as well. The implications that could arise from this skewed portrayal of CHIJ students are not to be taken lightly. Even if the article was meant to be "tongue-in-cheek", the act is made more serious as it was meant for the perusal of overseas visitors and to give an "Insider's Guide to help them get the most out of their stay". In what way would getting a warped perception of IJ girls help them do so? Indeed, with no one to advise them, these same overseas visitors will return to their countries with the misconception that IJ Girls are as described; in effect, causing the established name of CHIJ to be tarnished throughout the world. We deeply treasure our school's rich history of 152 years, which saw the arrival of courageous and dedicated nuns to provide education to the women and orphans here in Singapore . Tremendous sacrifices were made by these missionaries, who dedicated their lives to the education of thousands of young women in Singapore . With one stroke of the pen, the huge amount of effort, determination and hard work put in by countless number of people through the years has been undermined. Perhaps, we should take it as an honour for our school to be considered such an important part of life in Singapore, that it should merit a mention in the "Alternative Singapore Encyclopedia". However, the deplorable way in which CHIJ has been portrayed has served to give readers a false impression of all that CHIJ stands for. I would like to add my voice to the growing torrent of those condemning the totally unnecessary, unsubstantiated and prejudiced pronouncements regarding IJ girls. This cannot be excused as an example of being "light hearted", "tongue-in-cheek" kind of writing meant to provide entertaining reading. The fact of the matter is that taken in its context, the words are hurtful and do demean and denigrate IJ girls - those in uniform and those proud to call IJ their alma mater. Humour and entertainment at the expense of innocent persons without cause or provocation, especially by a mass circulation newspaper with such standing, can never be condoned.

i still remember, this 'alternative singapore encyclopaedia' article was on the Sunday Times and it was during our pre-lim period. szeching and i suggested/persuaded germaine and isabel and a couple of others that we should respond. and thus, this article.

ching, let's go back to IJ some time sooon, okay?! :D yeewon and dharl too!

story

spend some time to read this :D


I met a boy and fell for him fast. We moved fast. Everything was such a rush, everything was perfect, we were so obsessed with each other. He would tell me I was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. He would say “you're amazing” every hour. Except when he said it, it wasn’t just a line, it was the truth. The truth in his eyes. But I had to leave, and I knew I couldn’t do long distance. I have too ,any whims, I’m not good at being alone, I would have strayed. So I just cut off all contact, said cruel and hurtful things, pushed him away on purpose, alienated him so that he would leave me alone. Because it hurt too much to be friends, I thought it would be better to have no contact.



I was wrong. It was the stupidest decision of my life, because I find that not knowing someone well, can make you never get over them. The truth is, I don’t know him that well. What we had was short, it was over before I had a chance to see whether we were really good together, whether he was right for me. So all this time, even while I’ve had relationships with so many other guys, I always compare the new boys to one boy who I barely even knew, and they all fall short. Because his memory is so perfect, it’s so indestructible because it’s unfinished. I didn’t have time to discover his flaws, the little quirks that annoy, the arguments that break a couple a part. I didn’t give him a chance to show me that side of himself. All I have are the memories of that new, excited feeling. Of butterflies every time his fingers brushed my arm, of electric sparks every time we kissed, because it was so new, and unexpected and amazing. I have idealized this boy to the point where he is perfect in my eyes, and because of that, I can’t be satisfied with anyone else. But I can’t go back to him either, I cut off all ties, made it clear I never wanted to talk to him. He doesn’t know I think about him every day. He probably thinks he was completely insignificant, because I lied, and told him that he was. I swore I couldn’t care less. He has no idea. And I have no idea what it would be like to really be with him, have a real relationship with him, and I have to live with the fact that it is completely my fault. For being so proud, and so presumptuous to think I would get over him in two minutes. I never thought I’d hold on this long, to a ghost of a person. To an illusion of a person, that isn’t very likely a true reflection of him anyway.



And my advice to anyone reading this is, don’t let opportunities pass you by. Don’t dismiss people without thinking about how you may feel later. Don’t end something great, just because you think it would be too inconvenient to your life to let it continue. The truth is, everyone needs closure. Even if you do try something, and it’s difficult, and it ends, at least you know you tried. At least you know it was really the right decision to end it. You tried, and you failed. That’s okay, that’s something you’ll get over. But wondering, always wondering how it would have went if you had just let it happen, that’s torture. It’s the “what ifs” that keep me up at night. And the fact that he was strong enough to want me, to want to put up a fight for me, and I wasn’t strong enough to fight for him. And for the way I feel now, I have only myself to blame.


copied this from ching's blog because i think that it is worth reading! :D
credit to Le Love as well :D